Resolve to be thyself; and know that who finds himself, loses his misery. --Matthew Arnold
Our need for approval compels us to try to look good - no matter what's going on. We imagine that somehow everything will be okay as long as it looks okay. Our hearts may be breaking from fear, disillusionment, and rejection, real or imagined, but we keep smiling so that no one will guess.
Why do we do this to ourselves? Is it so hard to turn to a friend and say, "Hey, I'm hurting. I've been having a bad time and I need help"? Would the earth tremble if we said it right out, just like that? We're not likely to get what we don't ask for. Instead of denying that our knees are shaking, our hands are sweating, and our stomachs are in torment, we can admit and share the truth.
We don't have to say "Fine!" when someone asks us how we're doing. Our real friends aren't impressed by stiff upper lips; they're impressed by personal honesty.
3 comments:
Fairy reading went right to my center. How I manage to revert to old thinking is so tiresome. I realized from the first few sentences that I had been doing exactly that. Time for a change.
"We don't have to say "Fine!" when someone asks us how we're doing. Our real friends aren't impressed by stiff upper lips; they're impressed by personal honesty."
Love that because it so true, Mel. Our initial response is always, "I'm fine."
I learned this about being fearful and admitting to it. Because when I admit that I'm afraid of something, it gradually releases me from the fear.
Excellent fairy reading reminder!
Thanks!
X
Um...yes...and no.
I've often found that when I speak the truth of how I want to feel...I actually feel better than when I speak the current reality.
Hmmmm.
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