I do not shop.
I do not enjoy or even closely LIKE the task of shopping.
NOT my deal.
"You shop like a man."
This was said to me after I presented the right person with the right paperwork for the shopping I offered to do since I was in the area of where the shopping gets done at.
They were kind enough to furnish me with a list....and $557 later--done deal.
Yes, it was quite the list.
I was kinda proud of myself.
Afterall, I'd.......shopped.
*shudder*
"Yup--you shop like a man."
Pardon me?
"Got everything on the list, didn't ya."
(Again--I was kinda proud of myself...)
Yup. Got everything on the list. Even the sticky tac stuff for hanging crud on the wall.
"Everything on the list and nothing else........"
$557 later--done deal.
Get in, get it, get out!
"Yup--just like a man........"
(I wasn't sure if I was going to be offended or smug.)
(I opted for smug.)
And then......directly after exiting that situation-- there appeared two HUGE bags of M&M's on the desk....and an equally HUGE bag of licorice.
"Okay.....I take it back. You bought chocolate! GOOD job!!!!"
(I paused.)
(Really I did.)
(I even thought about it.......'truth/lie/truth/lie/truth/lie'.....)
The gal behind the happy little staff member delving into the bag of M&M's cocked her head a bit.......and I knew I was about to be busted.....
Ummmm....yeah, well.....I didn't purchase the chocolate.
"No she didn't. I picked 'em up when I went to get groceries--and no.....they weren't on the list."
Oh.......Pfffffffffffffttttttttttttttttttttttttt!
Zactly WHO hired these people?!?!
(yes.....I know.....I did.......)
And I'll have ya know himself buys stuff off the list ALL THE TIME.
O
M
G
What's THAT tell ya.......
4 comments:
HILARIOUS, Mel!!!!
And...$557 later--done deal.
OMG...what did you BUY?!?!?
That can't all be M&M's and licorice, hu?
Yes, you do shop like a man because I too would have threw those items in - HA!
X
I'm a buyer, not a shopper. I like to get in, get it, get out. Fast, efficient. I tend to find parking spots close to the building too, and I don't even have a handicap tag! And who says you didn't have those M&M'smon a mental list? I always have something for me on the mental lsit. If you don't like it, then send someone else to buy stuff.
Oh, I'm a man, (In case you were wonderin')
Peace
One of the worst parts of managing a Senior's residence was having to go on the odd shopping trip because it was a monstrous list and I had to sign at stores that want the same signature as on the credit card.
I'd wear my pedometer just for fun. We walked FIVE MILES OF AISLES! That came to about 6 or 7 hundred dollars. It was all afternoon and we had to unpack the danged stuff once we got back on to our island.
I don't know if I shop like a man, but I sure don't want to examine every piece of glitter and glitz. As you say, let's get the job done!
LOL. It's women that shop efficiently. Men just don't shop at all unless they're driven to it by forces beyond their control. Which is why they don't always do it very well.
(me, tactful or what?)
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