Vulnerability
Some of us may have made a decision that no one was ever going to hurt us again. We may automatically go on "feelings freeze mode" when faced with emotional pain. Or, we may terminate a relationship the first time we feel hurt. Hurt feelings are a part of life, relationships, and growing. It is understandable that we don't want to feel any more pain. Many of us have had more than our share, in fact, at some time in our life, we may have been overwhelmed, crushed, or stopped in our tracks by the amount of pain we felt. We may not have had the resources to cope with our pain or take care of ourselves.
That was yesterday. Today, we don't have to be so frightened of pain. It does not have to overwhelm us. We are becoming strong enough to deal with hurt feelings. And we don't have to become martyrs, claiming that hurt feelings and suffering are all there is to life.
We need only allow ourselves to feel vulnerable enough to feel hurt, when that's appropriate, and take responsibility for our feelings, behaviors, and what we need to do to take care of ourselves. We don't have to analyze or justify our feelings. We need to feel them, and try not to let them control our behavior.
Maybe our pain is showing us we need to set a boundary; maybe it's showing us we're going in a wrong direction; maybe it's triggering a deep healing process.
It's okay to feel hurt; it's okay to cry; it's okay to heal; it's okay to move on to the next feeling, when it's time. Our willingness and capacity to feel joy will eventually match our willingness and capacity to feel hurt.
3 comments:
I still question why I go back and allow more hurt from the same person/situation. Like the battered woman that won't press charges.
I guess some of what your selling is working. Maybe it hurts less or I understand it better. Yeah, that's it. It's better as time and healing grab hold.
Peace
I feel less pain these days... not sure if age has changed me or if it's a lesson learned. Whichever, it's more peaceful on the inner soul.
Wow...what a powerful TFTD, Mel!
There is so much truth in what the fairies say.
Throughout these many years, I've learned that is much healthier for me to 'feel' emotional pain, than it is to cut myself off from it. Because if I don't, I end up cutting myself off from feeling...period.
"We don't have to analyze or justify our feelings. We need to feel them, and try not to let them control our behavior."
Amen! Because by feeling the feelings, it move us through them.
Thanks for sharing, dear lady!
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