Oy..........

Right.

I suggested she 'not borrow trouble' by thinking about what she doesn't even KNOW.  Wait, buy time, talk with the oncology fella, ask questions, find out what 'the higher dose' actually MEANS.

I know that carboplatin is a 'gentler option'--I also know that platinum based therapies can manage a 'parent resistance'.  They can kill the 'children' but the 'parents' become resistant and then you're left with an oncologist that's scratching their head, trying to come up with the 'next cocktail'.
I was glad for the 'gentler' option IF they were convinced that was the best shot.
The B team oncologist was smart enough to send her back to the A team doc to a) have the lump on the tongue looked at (that he's convinced isn't cancer--thank you G-d for that one!!) and b) have a 'chat' about what really was the best option to eliminate the damn cancer from her body withOUT a return engagement.
Frankly, I was glad--cuz as I well know, the lesser of two evils is STILL evil.  I'd like 'gentler', but I WANT effective.
I wasn't suprised when she told me where the A and B team's consultation landed.  I just didn't like it.
Mostly cuz it scared her and him.  He's afraid she's not strong enough to do the harder hit.
I'm afraid if they don't DO the harder hit, they'll end up with a resistant cancer.  But I'm buying time and finding out exactly what the cocktail they're suggesting really is.

So I told her 'do as I do AND say......I'm gonna pace and check out the garden and ponder just how long it'll take the two newly spotted hummingbirds to get used to me so I can snap a photo or six million!'.

She's got hummingbirds that adore that orange tree of hers.
She needs to spend more time there, plotting how to get a photo and less time trying to figure out what she doesn't have the information TO figure out.
Buy time.  Go in with the questions.  In the meantime, go convince her hummingbirds that she's good people!
Besides....... she's already asked the A team doc the important questions--"Is this the best chance of killing the cancer so it stays gone and do you believe I'm strong enough to do the higher dose?"

He gave "Yes" answers to both.

I'm not exactly sure what it is that we think we have TO think about given those answers......but I'm damn clear we're ALL THINKING........

Stupid assed fear crap........

<-- going back to the patio with the flash armed JUST in case 45 minutes really is enough time to 'get used to me'......